Date : November 10, 2007
Time : 2:10am
Mood : edgy.
My gums are still hurting from yesterday's extraction, and for someone who can tolerate a great deal of pain, I have to say that I am a blink of an eye away from banging my head to the wall to numb the pain. It wasn't so much of the tooth saying goodbye to my mouth, but the trauma my gums are going through right now that's bugging me and leading me to write just to block the pain. Yeah. Write something gross to freak out your readers. Want a blow-by-blow account of my trip to the dentist's chair (of doom)? Hehehe. Block. Erase. And start over.
Hmm.. Dad dropped by the house pretty late tonight. He usually comes in the afternoons to relax a bit before he hits the sack in his flat. Anyhoo, sometimes I just leave him be in the company of his brother and cousin and they talk about the daily happenings in their lives or of other peoples'. Tonight though, I thought I'd stay out with them by the backyard and listen in on their "chismis". When my uncle left to get something, he turned to me and asked how life was doing... I said it was fine, and gave him accounts of the things that has happened that I hadn't had the chance to tell him yet.
So I ask him how his projects were doing and he goes on to talk about it. But first he talks about his early years and the things he's gone through, the career he chose and the name that he's made. He has certainly gone a long way and I commend him for being such a man. Jeez, if I could only be a quarter of the person that he is! Why on earth, did I not inherit his mathematical genius? I could have taken up civil engineering like he did! hehe. I let him talk about his projects in Mindanao... He's handling road and bridge projects funded by Saudi-Kuwait, and they're mostly located in risk-oriented areas. The last batch of projects that he handled were those funded by the ADB, and that took him years to finish because it was a whole bunch of projects funded at the same time. Now that was a deadly position. Two of his predecessors had to do early retirement and one died three months after he got that job before dad was appointed to that position. It was that toxic. But my dad... He finished the whole thing. So all the beautiful roads and bridges that you see and actually tread, from Luzon to Mindanao were parts of his projects (the foreign-funded projects, local projects aren't his). The ADB people actually cried when he finished the job, coz that meant he won't be with them anymore. And they even reacted when the Saudi Kuwait got him to do their projects in Mindanao because ADB is preparing a new batch of projects lined up for the country and they want him to handle it. He is that good. And I'm damn proud of it.
What makes my heart more prouder is the fact that the people I meet who know my dad have nothing but good words to tell me about him--professional, straight-forward, doesn't get intimidated by high-browed sleazebag officials, especially when he knows he's right and highly principled. The one word I hear most from them is that he's kind. Mabait. At times it surprises me when I hear stories from other people whom he'd helped; usually from small people and those who really deserve to get a break from this I-have-a-strong-backer-and-you-don't professional world. It's surprising because he doesn't tell us the things he does--stuff like that, anyways. Yes, he helps those he thinks are deserving and in need. His contractors like him alot because he's not one to demand anything from them (I can super attest to that--if that were the case we'd be super rich and I won't be living in this country anymore!) That's why officials who demand percentages for projects do not come to him because he doesn't believe in such. Takot sila sa daddy ko.
Some people wonder why I don't work for my dad. Why I don't use him to get me a high-paying job in his office or any of his kumpare's. I can't. Because he won't. Because he's not one to pull strings for his kids. He wants them to make it the way he and mom made it on their own. He wants us to get what is due us, what we deserve. Without pulling anyone down. Without stepping on other people's toes. That's how professional he is. There had been times it made me angry because he wouldn't do that for us, while others do anything and everything just to land their kids a great, stable job. But at the end of the day, he comes out right and on top.
So, he goes on to tell me that I'm lucky because my family and I won't have to go through the things he and mom did (and I know it was hard--I was there, too), and I'm super grateful for that! He went on to say that if things went my way and I let it pass by without doing anything, it wasn't meant for me (coz I told him about the job offers I've had the past years that I declined), that we were still young (he thinks?!) and we've still got a long way to go. He also told me not to rush things (joining politics--at least not yet, or whatever we want na hindi pa namin kaya gawin), because it will all just come at the right time. Better to take things gradually, slowly rise up rather than be placed somewhere on top and tumble down and fall flat on your face. Take care of your family, especially your parents (and I can clearly see that in the way they take care of lolo, lola and ina). And be mindful of other people that you do not step on their toes or offend them. Do not be impatient, ever. Because if it's your destiny, if ALLAH wills it, no matter what you do, where you are, if something is really meant for you, it will happen. Hmm.. true that, true that. Words from a wise man.
The grandfather's clock strikes a quarter to twelve and dad takes this as his cue to leave. He gets up and says goodbye, and that he'll be back the next morning. As I clean up the mess (cigarette butts, glasses, leftovers) I ponder on the things he's told me. He's right, you know... parents always are (like I am..wehhh!). It's just that it gets irritating sometimes when the world seems to pass by right before your very eyes and you're just standing there, wondering why you're not part of it... and being the impatient person that I am, it leaves me frustrated, you know? But yeah.t.when it's not for you, it's not for you. *sigh*breathe*sigh* Just gotta stay positive, and hella lot more patient. Rome wasn't built in a day. I mean, his career is thirty-plus years old, I certainly don't think I could surpass what he's accomplished with a blink of an eye. You really have to start somewhere. Maybe that somewhere is here, now.
Jeez, dad... why'd you have to be so great? hehe.
Time : 3:23 am
Mood : a bit calmer now.
Hmm... I can't say if it's the blogging that's calmed me down that I've now forgotten the pain in my traumatized gum...
But then... that could be the painkiller working its magic.
I'm calling it a night... or a morning rather...
There's a box of Krispy Kreme still in my fridge though. Hmm.
Haha!
I'm out.
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